Tuesday, November 29, 2016

Yesterday I was outside in the garden and an airplane flew over the house. I looked up and thought about all the times I sat in one of those tiny seats awaiting a new adventure. How life changes. Now I am sitting on my bed with filthy hair, chipped toenail polish and smelling quite a lot like sour breast milk. Grace is sleeping in her cot like an absolute angel and for the first time in 3 weeks I have a chance to reflect on this whole parenting 2 kids business.


Wednesday, November 23, 2016

We all carry little scars from our childhood – maybe it was a brat that called you an idiot on the playground or the time your boyfriend dumped you for another girl or when your high school friends went camping without you because your parents said no… Whatever that moment was to you, it will show up again when you become a parent. For me it was the extra weight I carried from puberty until today. I don’t remember a time when I didn’t hate my body. High school was a never-ending cycle of diets and weigh-ins and self-loathing. Having lived through those years of feeling ugly and depressed and so completely miserable in my skin, I have always vowed to never let me kids become overweight. I never want Sophie or Grace to struggle with those hurtful feelings. This resolve makes me a little psycho about food sometimes, but it has also encouraged a very important discussion in our household: the one about healthy eating.


Friday, November 18, 2016

For me, becoming a mom was like experiencing my own personal big bang. The world as I knew it ended only to come back together as something more wonderful, more fulfilling and crammed with so much love I could barely breathe. Parenting Sophie for the last 3 years has been such a learning curve for me. People often say that children teach you more than you teach them and I am here to confirm that that is indeed a fact.


Friday, November 04, 2016

Life lately could easily be summed up as “what the hell were we thinking having another baby?!?!?!?!”

Ok, not really, but in preparing for Human #2 I have had my fair share of freak-outs. While many friends with multiples have assured me that you do manage (disclaimer: no one has actually given specifics on how exactly you manage), I still can’t help the occasional panic. We’ve got just a few days to until our new little bundle of love arrives, and after 9 months of preparing, I almost feel ready. Almost.

Freak-outs aside, here are a few more things I’ve been up to lately:

Have you read The Crossroads Between Should and Must yet? If you find yourself in an internal struggle between the desire to achieve your goals and the obligations of daily life, this book is for you. You can buy the paperback here or download the free pdf here. It has changed the way I look at my wants and needs. Should is what everyone expects of us, must is the person calling from deep within; the one we often suppress or ignore. Go read it.

Fanta floats in whiskey glasses
Summer is slowly starting to show her sweaty face in Cape Town. While there have been a few lovely warm days, I am so happy that they have been spaced between one or two cloudy, cooler days. I am not ready for the heat just yet. Sophie, on the hand is in her absolute element. From demanding to wear princess dresses to school everyday to running around the garden barefoot and covered in sand. Side note: if you are looking for a great outdoor play space to take your little ones, I can highly recommend the River Rascals play are at the River Club in Observatory. It is divine. 

I am so addicted to – like millions of other moms, the posts just resonate on every level. This particular post really stuck out for me. I read it twice. I can’t tell you how many photos I have skipped out on because I feel too fat or too ugly or underdressed. I don’t want my kids to look back on their childhood and feel a disconnect between the mom they knew and the mom that appeared in 3 or 4 pictures. I want to be able to sit on my couch when I am 80 years old with my photo albums bursting with memories, I want to be able to pour over pictures of Regan and I with our daughters. So I have turned into that lunatic at family events that takes pictures and demands to be photographed as well. This is so far out of my comfort zone, but I am embracing it.

Gosh, one of the most common things to come out of my mouth over the past few months has got to be my soliloquy about how flippen tough it is living with a 3 year old. I have learned that the only way to control my feelings is to accept the lack of control I have. Sophie is growing so fast and it is the very definition of bittersweet, her thoughts, her opinions, her moods, they all feel like part of another life, one where I have a much older child. At this tender age she is demanding to be seen as an independent human being and that is so hard. It’s hard because for goodness sake you are 3, I know I know better and please just be a baby for a tiny bit longer.


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