Friday, December 22, 2017

I took a little browse through the favourites folder on my phone today and boy, what a trip to Tear Town that turned out to be.

Isn't it amazing how much can change in a year? When 2017 started I was a stay at home mom to a tiny little baby. Now I am working and that tiny little baby is edging quickly towards the toddler years (who am I kidding? She is a toddler).

Here are a few of my favourite moments from 2017:


Tuesday, December 19, 2017

Yesterday, one of my of my favourite bloggers, Laura (Harassed Mom) wrote a really beautiful post about the lessons she's learned this year. It got me thinking... I have learned so much, but a lot of what I have learned has come to me because I have read something that resonated so deeply it inspired me to change a habit or behaviour. 

That's pretty powerful, right? I mean often I read things and this, "Oh that's nice", but I never do anything about it. 


Sunday, December 10, 2017

Gosh this is a narcissistic blog post…

Maybe I should start with some context. I have been going through an incredibly rough bout of writers block. The creativity well has dried up and the fact that I earn a living by writing has only been amplifying my anxiety around not being able to write a decent sentence.


Saturday, December 09, 2017

I always used to daydream about the kind of parent I’d be. Like many moms before me, and many more to come, I had a mental list of things I’d never do, things I’d never want to be.  But sadly, life is not a daydream and reality is almost always, quite a sobering experience.


Saturday, November 18, 2017

Christmas is weeks away (cue epic FREAK OUT) and I am in full on planning almost every other person living in our country, my biggest concern this year is cost. I don’t want to have a lavish festive season and then spend January on my knees. But how do I create the same sense of magic and abundance without bankrupting my household budget? This month I’m going to be looking at how to host a cost effective Christmas in a series of posts, starting with this one.


Friday, November 17, 2017

One of the hardest parenting choices I made was choosing my child's car seat. Since having Gracie, I realised what uneducated choices we made when Sophie was born. The #Carseatfullstop campaign is an invaluable resource for parents just starting out, but also for those of us who have been through the process before. There is an avalanche of information out there, but it's hard to know what's correct.


Monday, November 06, 2017

Images of our home will never grace the pages of glossy decor magazines. We live in a constant state of mess. Piles of clothing rest patiently on bits of furniture. Toys are strewn liberally across the lounge. Our couch always seems to have bits of food jammed between the pillows. Our kids are happy. This house is their home, this house is their safe haven.

Regan and I are both fiercely passionate about beautiful design. We love furniture. We love fabrics. We love gorgeous pieces of art. Our home does not reflect these passions though. Why? Because we have never been able to find a balance between furnishing our home with what we love and creating a space our children love to be in.


Saturday, November 04, 2017

“Regan! Babe! Babe! Your alarm’s going off!! Babe wake up! Put off your alarm! Jeeeezuz I’m not your mom. This is so ridiculous. WAKE THE F#^CK UP!!”
“Guys look how gorgeous daddy is. Isn’t he such a dish. Show us your muscles! Give us a kiss babe!” 


Tuesday, October 31, 2017

This weekend we attended the launch of the #DisneyAfrica character shop at Edgars in Canal Walk. We'd had an incredibly frantic day which started at 5 am with Grace waking up and screaming like a banshee. We had a kids party to get to, a lunch with friends and a trip to the shops that all needed to happen before 12. Walking into the character shop was like walking into a fairy tale. I instantly forgot about our tight schedule and embraced my inner Disney princess. We scoffed some popcorn, shared a candy floss, Sophie refused to have her face painted which was a bummer but we did have enormous fun in the ball pond.


Friday, September 22, 2017

If you’re a regular reader of my blog, you will know that product reviews are few and far between. The reason for this is quite simple: things don’t inspire me, people do. So when Jaclyn from Schnooky Pie emailed me about the launch of her new range of girls clothes, my first reaction was: eek, how am I going to do these gorgeous clothes justice? Well, as it turns out Jaclyn is just amazing and I find myself in the fortunate position of not being about to shut up about her and her gorgeous brand. 


Wednesday, September 20, 2017


I'm honestly afraid that Grace is going to be a fussy eater. Weaning her onto solids has been quite the event. We were so lucky with Soph, she ate anything we put in front of her. She still does. She also has a taste for salty foods, so she's obsessed with olives, gets cheese, gherkins, salami etc. she also adores any kind of salad and most veggies. What does Grace adore? Porridge. That's it. That's about the only thing she’s willing to eat some days. She refuses anything savoury (even if she's hungry) and while she's ok to eat fruit, crappy, nutrient-lacking rice porridge is her favourite thing in the world. I've actually cried about this.

After a short elimination test, we've come to realise that she likes things with little to no flavour or if there is a flavour, then that flavour needs to be sweet. It makes it really hard to feed her healthy, nutritious meals. But luckily, we've cottoned on to a few great combos that are working well and packed with goodness.


Moms! Do not spend another cent on store bought rice cereals. It is so easy to make delicious, fiber-rich homemade brown rice porridge. This is how it's done:

Take half a cup of brown rice and blend it until to a powder.
Boil half a cup of water and add 2 Tbsp of the rice powder.
Whisk this for 30 seconds until thoroughly mixed.
Turn down the heat and let it simmer for 4 minutes, stir occasionally.
Add puréed fruit to flavor.


Because Grace will only eat sweet things, we've had to really flex our thinking muscle when considering food combinations for here. All you'll need to make these is a blender (a stick blender is also fine)
These are our winning ones:

Banana and raspberry
1 banana
1/5 cup raspberries
Add water if consistency is too thick

Butternut, chickpeas and banana
1/3 cup butternut
1/3 cup chickpeas
1 banana
Add water if consistency is too thick

Blueberry, mango and avocado
1/4 avocado
1/5 cup blueberries
1 slice mango
Add water if consistency is too thick

Apple and oats porridge
1 sachet instant oats prepared according to pack
1/5 apple, skin removed and cubed
Add apple to hot oats
Add water if consistency is too thick

Chickpea, sweet potato and banana
1/2 medium size sweet potato, steamed
1 banana – ripe and mashed
1/3 can chickpeas, drained
Add water if consistency is too thick

Blueberry and beetroot mash – so yum!
2 medium-sized beetroots
½ cup blueberries
Peel and chop beetroot.
Place beets and berries in a medium sized pot, cover with water and cook for 10-15 minutes
Once cooked, blend.
Add water if consistency is too thick

What are some of your tried and tested baby food combinations? 


Tuesday, September 05, 2017

This post has been rolling around in my subconscious for so long now. I honestly feel like I've had to dip my bucket into the courage well in order to publish it.

For as long as I can remember I have been a bit of an agnostic. I am passionate about science. Living in an age of proof is amazing. Our knowledge is exponential and it only stretches every day. As we grow as a species, we learn so much more about our planet and our bodies and it's wonderful. This age of proof lends itself so well to questioning all the things we do not fully understand. Things like faith.

When Sophie was born, like in that exact moment I first laid eyes on her, I said the first prayer I'd said in decades. I was overcome with every emotion and I looked at her perfect little face and the first thing I did was thank a God I had struggled to accept for most of my adult life.

I immediately pushed the concept of faith aside and carried on with this new chapter in my life.

Then when Sophie was 18 months old she got really sick. We found out she had a congenital disorder in her digestive system and needed emergency surgery. Sitting in Vincent Palotti hospital, in the cold, dark waiting area outside of the surgical wing, I once again found myself turning to this God. I prayed my second prayer over her life and I cried so many tears. In the end she was OK and while the entire experience shook me to my core, my little girl was healthy and happy and back to her old self in no time.

I once again pushed this idea of faith aside and carried on with my life.

Years later I was pregnant with Grace. My pregnancy turned from uneventful to quite terrifying in a matter of weeks. I went into preterm labor and had unexplained bleeding at the start of my last trimester. Once again I said a prayer. This time it was more like begging. I begged for forgiveness for ignoring what was in my heart. I begged for the life of my child. I begged for everything to be ok. And it was.

Grace was born a healthy, happy little baby and this time my prayer over her life was deliberate and said with such intention. I wanted God to know that I didn't understand him. I wanted him to know that my faith terrifies me. I wanted him to know that despite these two things, I was putting my baby's life in his hands because something deep in my heart was telling me to. Something I could not explain.

Accepting this sense of faith has been so difficult for me because it challenges all the things I uphold as true. It makes me feel judged and scoffed at. It makes me self-conscious.

I have wanted to write about my reluctant fall into faith for so long but I haven't felt brave enough. I don't know why I'm doing it now. All I can say is that I wake up every day and I feel God's presence in my life. I feel like my life is following a path that is greater than I am. I look at my children and I see these two amazing gifts that have been given to me. I don't know why I deserve the life I have. But I am grateful. I don't know why I believe in God. I don't know how I can accept the part he plays in my life. I don't understand where this faith comes from because I have not nurtured it. Maybe I want to believe and perhaps that's enough. I've come to accept that my faith is unshakable. I know this because I tried to ignore it for years.

I'm at a place in my life where I can no longer hold onto pretense and hypocrisy (especially my own). I have not always been the best version of myself and I know that it is only in my moments of absolute authenticity that I am my happiest. Finding the courage to always be honest and true to myself and my beliefs has been something of a radical journey for me. I'm enjoying my life so much more now that I have embraced my flaws, my mistakes, the broken parts of me, the wonderful parts of me. I'm happier because I know that even at my worst, I am loved, when I am at my lowest, I am not lost.

While I know and accept that faith and religion is not for everyone, I have grown to realise that it is for me.



Monday, September 04, 2017

It's Saturday afternoon.
There is nothing special about today.
You will not remember today.
But I will.
I will remember today because today, I am lost in the magic of motherhood.


Friday, August 11, 2017

There’s a concept I find myself going back to and thinking about so often that I almost have it written on my heart. It’s this idea that as mothers we are hardwired to seek out connections with other mothers, and we live in a world where that is no longer as possible as it used to be. I once read this quote, and it’s still with me:


Welcome to the latest installment of ‘Just a minute in’…. which I have affectionately renamed JAMI.

Please forgive me for the radio silence this month. It’s been a savage time, filled with snot, poo, throw up and so much crying.


Thursday, July 27, 2017

Sophie doesn’t often nag for toys. Maybe she would if she knew the names of more toys, but we’re lucky because she’s pretty clueless, for now at least. However, she has been obsessed with one particular range of toys for ages now… yup, it’s the Chubby Puppies. We’ve watched countless YouTube videos of little children all over the world unboxing Chubby Puppies and to be honest, I didn’t even know that they were available in South Africa. So you can imagine how excited I was when I got a mail asking if we’d like to review a few puppies from the range a host a giveaway.


Friday, July 14, 2017

Grace is lying next to me. She’s an hour in to her morning nap. I am looking down at her, her hair is damp and stuck to her flawless little face, her little rosebud mouth is pursed in the perfect “O”, her chubby little hands are sticking out from under the duvet and she’s making the sweetest little cooing sounds. I am looking down at her and I am filled with breathtaking sadness because I know this is the last time I will be looking down at a little baby sleeping in my bed.


Wednesday, July 05, 2017

This is going to be a short read because this argument is so ridiculous.

Not a day goes by when I am not confronted by this ridiculous notion that my choice to become a mother precludes my choice to embrace feminism.


Monday, July 03, 2017

I don’t know a single mom who hasn’t been consumed and terrified by the news lately. From the heartbreaking story of little Courtney Petersen’s death to the countless other stories about children taken and murdered at the hands of monsters.  And then we saw that video, the one of the man attempting to steal a child from the play area at a Spur restaurant. That video sent us over the edge because it’s SO close to home. Who hasn’t taken their little ones to Spur and enjoyed a plate of calamari while they played in the play area? While there is always a little nugget of paranoia lurking somewhere in our minds, we never thought child abductors would be frequenting our trusted family restaurants. Or did we?

The world we live in demands that parenting and paranoia go hand in hand. We lambaste our little ones for waving at strangers or daring to explore their surroundings. We don’t allow them to play unsupervised outside. Trips to the park start with a stern talking to about wandering off. We grill them about their teachers, their friend’s parents, and their activities, desperately hoping we haven’t missed a sign of foul play. When we read stories about things going wrong, we quickly shout: “BUT WHERE WERE THE PARENTS?!”

Our parenting DNA has been permanently altered to suit the sick society we find ourselves in, but are we going about this the right way? We already live in self-imposed prisons; does our approach to parenting mean that we are also building psychological prisons for our children and ourselves? What can we do to ensure that we are giving our kids the very best childhood without significantly compromising their safety?

Here are some of the things we are putting into action with Sophie. Our main goal is to ensure that we’re ticking all the boxes without raising her to be a cynical child who’s frightened of the world she lives in:

Sophie is only 4 so saying that she does not really look after things is a fair statement. The decision to get her a GPS tracking watch was a weighty one because they are not cheap, and the chances of her losing it are quite high. But given the odds, I would happily write off R1000 if it meant I had peace-of-mind when it came to my child’s whereabouts. (Read this story about how Sharon from The Blessed Baroness had the scare of her life when she couldn’t find her daughter) If you’re considering getting a GPS watch for your child, look for one that has all of the following features:
Call function 
Alert when watch is taken off 
Safe zones 
Alert when your child leaves a safe zone 
Heart rate alert – you need to know if your child is afraid. 

Consider what you allow and what you share. Thankfully Sophie is completely unaware of social media. But as she gets older, I know it is going to come up.
My rules around social media:  
Absolutely no Instagram 
Absolutely no Facebook 
Absolutely no Twitter
Whatsapp will be allowed
This could be revised when they’re in high school but it would depend on strict monitoring. Phones will need to be handed over every evening for a complete check of all content that has been consumed and shared.
My rules for sharing images of my kids online: 
Absolutely no nudity. 
Absolutely no images containing identifying information, specifically locations
Absolutely no pictures of other children unless we have their parents permission. 

A while ago I posted a little note on our Facebook page about the dangers of preaching “stranger danger” and why we’re not doing it anymore. The truth is, there may come a day when your child needs the help of a stranger. I would hate for that to happen only for my child to feel too afraid to ask for the help they need. So instead of talking about “stranger danger” we’re talking about “tricky grown ups” – adults with bad intentions. How are we doing this? Two ways:
1. No adult will ever ask for a child’s help. If an adult approaches asking you to help them with anything, scream. Adults help children, not the other way around. Did someone lose their puppy and needs help looking for it? Did someone misplace their bag and asks if you can help them? Sound the alarm. They are trying to trick you.
2. Adults you don’t know shouldn’t do nice things for you. Never accept gifts or sweets or anything, no matter how nice, from an adult you don’t know. They are trying to trick you.

Sleepovers happen at our parent’s homes and my sister’s home. Nowhere else. No exceptions. It’s not up for discussion.

When I was little we used to say this poem: my body’s my body, no one’s but mine. You have your body and this is mine. I think the intention of this was to gently introduce the concept of consent. My biggest problem with this is that consent is not a gentle issue and we do not live in gentle times. The issue of consent needs to be aggressively addressed and thoroughly enforced. This is how we are doing this with our 4 year old:
Always ask permission before giving someone (except mommy and daddy) a hug or a kiss. 
No and stop are very important words and should always be listened to and honored. 
Absolutely no forcing to hug and kiss anyone. 
It’s ok if you don’t feel like being touched, saying no is not rude. 

We are teaching Sophie that the safest place she can be is by our side. When we’re out, she needs to be able to see and hear us at all times, if she can’t see us or is too far away to hear us clearly, then she’s in danger. If she’s out without either of us, something that seldom happens, she needs to apply this thinking to the grown up she is out with.

This one is a work in progress. Children are very in touch with their feelings, but often struggle to articulate them. We are teaching Sophie that she should always listen to the little voice in her tummy that tells her when something is weird or scary or just not right. We were out recently and Sophie met a friend of a friend and this man was the first man that Sophie has ever strongly disliked. My first instinct was to be a little embarrassed because she was openly weary of him, and then I quickly came to my senses and asked him to please keep his distance because he is making her uncomfortable and as the adults we need to respect this. The worst thing we can do for our children is to ignore the instincts and not support their feelings.

Growing up, my sisters and I were groomed to be polite. Rudeness was not tolerated and speaking your mind was only encouraged if you had nice things to say. Now that I have children of my own, I am taking a different route.
It’s ok to be rude in the following situations: 
When you’ve said no or stop and no one is listening to you. 
When you are receiving unwanted attention. 
When someone tries to touch you without your permission. 
When an adult you don’t know tries to talk to you. 
When someone is abusive towards you. 

As parents we naturally ruminate over every worst case scenario our minds throw our way, but there is a fine line between living safely and living in a self-imposed prison built with your own anxiety and fear. We owe it to our families to educate ourselves about threats and parent responsibly. At the end of the day, our number one goal is, and will always be, to raise happy, strong children who feel safe and secure (not fearful and paranoid).

What are some of the ways you maintain security and safety for your family?



Thursday, June 29, 2017

Frazzled is literally the only way I could describe my current emotional state. Gracie's teething process is completely off the charts insane - we're racin to keep up with her runny tummy, nappy rash,  sore ears, grumpy face and crying (so much crying). My niece has been staying with me during the day because of school holidays. 9 year olds and 4 year olds are so different. It seems obvious, but really, they are SO different. I'm not sure I'm ready for a prepubescent daughter. My goodness.


Tuesday, June 13, 2017

Allow me paint the scene:
It’s early Saturday morning, Grace has just woken up, the house is silent and I am fumbling my way towards her cot to scoop her into my arms and ferry her to the kitchen where I can silently make her a bottle. I roll out of bed, place my feet on the floor and stand. I take a few steps forward and SNAP! I am assaulted by a sudden wave of excruciating pain. What the holy hell was that? I look down and see one of Sophie’s many Barbie’s sitting on the floor in the exact spot I just put my foot.


Monday, June 12, 2017


I've started writing this post so many times and I always stop half way because it's so difficult to talk about. Loving the body you have is an exercise in learning and unlearning so many things. 

A couple of weeks ago I was busy doing my 3 month declutter and I came across a shoe box full of my old journals from high school. I opened one up from my matric year and it was filled with such self-loathing it left me reeling. While reading the terrible things I wrote about myself, one thing became very clear to me: I never want my daughters to feel this way about their bodies. 


Wednesday, May 31, 2017

You guys, I know I cannot be the only one freaking out because we are almost half way through 2017 already?!?!


Thursday, May 25, 2017

Hi, I’m Kim.

I am a mom of three (still cannot believe it) - two boys and a baby girl.  My eldest Calin, is 12 years old, Sashin just turned 6 and then there is little Lyra, who is just a year old.  I have worked in the entertainment industry in South Africa for the past 20 years, producing rock concerts and live comedy events. Right now we live in Istanbul Turkey. We moved here about a year and half ago, for my husband’s work… A move that has proved quite scary and exciting at the same time. The boys are at school here and I spend my days with Lyra. Lyra was born in Istanbul, a tough decision but it worked out well in the end.  She is our little Turkish Delight. 


Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Zonnebloem Primary in Warmer Estate is one of the oldest schools in the country, and until now, it's never had it's own library. Thanks to the Chris Otto foundation, that's all changed. How absolutely gorgeous is this new space? I can't imagine a better space to foster and grow a love for in. 


Tuesday, May 16, 2017

It was Regan’s 39th birthday. All he wanted for his birthday was to have his girls and I around and enjoy some quality family time. Leading up to the day I had teased him relentlessly about going clubbing instead. I booked a surprise mini-break, thinking at the time, that it would be exactly what he wanted. I was also planning Sophie’s 4th birthday party. And then his dad a major stroke. A week later it was Sophie’s party. And the next day Regan’s dad passed away. A week after that we buried him and my well meaning plans turned from a celebratory weekend at the beach into a necessary escape to reset our souls.


Monday, May 15, 2017

Life has been a whirlwind of emotion and stress and well, life. We’ve been so caught up in everything that I almost missed the fact that Grace is now 6 months old. Half a year. Where has the time gone?


Tuesday, May 02, 2017

Every year I start off your birthday with the story of your birth. This year, I started telling the story and 3 minutes in, you said, “ok, bye mom”. It was cute and funny and absolutely heartbreaking. You are growing my sweet girl, emotionally and physically, and try as I may I just can’t seem to hold on to these years tightly enough.


Thursday, April 27, 2017

Sophie turned 4 this month and I have been knee deep in party prep all week. This post has been on my mind since Sophie’s birthday and now with her party fast approaching, I find myself grappling with bittersweet nostalgia. Like most parents, I struggle with each birthday because like, where has the time gone?

Sophie and I have a very special birthday tradition: every year, on her birthday, I tell her the story of her birth. This year, half way through the story she got up and said, “ok bye mom”. Of course my initial reaction was to feel completely crushed and heartbroken, but I got over it and instead reminisced with Regan.

The day I became a mother is one I will never forget. I may forget what Regan wore, or what my doctor’s name was and the pain of labor might dull with time but I will never forget the immense spectrum of emotion I experienced. That moment when you first hold your precious little baby is (for lack of a better word) completely overpowering. The joy, love, relief, exhaustion, panic, fear, happiness and love (yes, again) you feel is unforgettable. A few days will pass and then a new feeling will set in, I don’t know how to describe this new feeling, but for me, perhaps “sisterhood” would be a good starting point. You see, when you are a mom, you are many things, but one thing that remains constant is that you now belong to the biggest, strongest, most lit and most fierce tribe in existence.

But this sense of belonging isn’t enough, with it comes a very base need to reach out to other moms… To share stories of your journey, to have hour long discussions about the colour of your child’s poo, to compare notes on breastfeeding and recipes for jungle juice, to simply share and connect. This connection we share can, in our happiest moments, feel like a warm hug on a frigid winters day, and when days are dark (as they often are in motherhood), we have the power to be each other’s lifeline. When we share our strength and resolve, huge things can happen.

You don’t need me to remind you that there are many, many, many moms across our great country that enter into this colossal journey all alone. There is no partner to lovingly squeeze their hand during labor or share that knowing  “look what we’ve made” glance. There are no bunches of flowers decorating their hospital room or nappy cakes or congratulatory hugs from loved ones. They are alone. And many are alone and afraid. Afraid, perhaps because as wonderful as motherhood is, it is also the beginning of a life of worry and stress and expectation that in those early hours, can feel impossible to meet. You know that wonderful connection I was just talking about, that awesome tribe? Well, you have the opportunity to welcome a new mom into that tribe in person by taking part in a nationwide event that could literally change a new moms life.

If you had the opportunity to change someone’s life, would you take it?

Julie Mentor has founded an amazing organization aimed at reestablishing the sisterhood of mothers and this Mother’s Day, her organization, Cape Town Embrace, will be hosting a really incredible event. Moms in Cape Town, Joburg and Durban are being asked to sit with a new mom and connect, share and welcome this new mom to our very incredible sisterhood. Not a huge ask right?

If you need extra convincing, just watch this video of Julie talking about this special event: 

Let's recap: Make the choice to spend one hour of your day on Mother's Day at the maternity ward at your nearest public hospital. Talk to new moms, hold their hands, offer them words of encouragement, share your joys and hardships, tell them it's going to be ok. They need to hear it. 

If you’d like to find out more about Cape Town Embrace and the Mother’s Day Connect events, visit their website here >
Or sign up for the event on Facebook here >

Mandy said it best: “Imagine women gathering at every public birthing facility with the sole purpose of reclaiming Mother’s Day as a day for ALL mothers, starting with our country’s newest moms. Imagine a day of respectful celebration and gentle affirmation and the heavenly scent of a brand new baby.”



Thursday, April 06, 2017

I love everything about winter.

There’s something about the chill in the air that makes me crave closeness. It fills me with a longing for lazy lunches with my extended family, cuddles on the couch with Regan, all day pajama days with my girls. For me, winter is family, it is food, it is life at a decadently slow pace, it is comfort and indulgence and I cannot fault a single thing about this fast approaching season.


Tuesday, April 04, 2017

Blink… Blink… Blink… Goes the cursor as I look for the words to write this post. Sophie has said some pretty strange things in her short little life, but her recent comments on race have left me quite literally, speechless. Here is an example of two separate conversations we’ve had:


Monday, April 03, 2017

If January felt like a month of Monday’s, March has felt like a month of Sunday’s. Relaxing, stress-free, happy and so content. Here’s the highlights reel:


Monday, March 06, 2017

I had a very happy childhood. In many ways it was a very traditional one. My sisters and I are all quite close in age and I have very fond memories of shared bedrooms, playing in the garden and an overwhelming sense of love. I am very lucky to still have grandparents and when I sat down to write this post, I realised (probably for the first time) what a huge role my grandmothers have played in my decision to become a mother.


Monday, February 20, 2017

Gosh, kids parties have become SUCH productions. Between the R1000+ cakes and the R2000 sweet table (that no one touches because we all know sugar is the devil) it’s hard to find reasonable ways to celebrate your child’s birthday without spending R1000’s or taking off 2 weeks from work to DIY all the décor.


Friday, February 17, 2017

This photo was taken 2 days before Gracie was born. At the time I remember feeling quite large and uncomfortable. What I don’t remember feeling grateful for every moment we had as a little family of 3.


Monday, February 06, 2017

Every parent on this planet knows that mornings are the most crucial part of the day. A stubborn child, a lost shoe, a misplaced set of keys or a full-blown tantrum can send a potentially peaceful morning in an explosive direction. I really believe that the tone you set in the morning will follow you for the rest of the day. When everyone climbs out of the car feeling angry and upset or like his or her needs have not been considered, it makes for a pretty crappy day.


Thursday, February 02, 2017

I have never felt as clueless as I did after Sophie was born. As a new, first time mom there was so much (self-imposed) pressure to get it right. Chose the right pram, the right nappies, the right bath soap, the right shampoo. Only organic, free-range options handmade in the mountains of Nepal were considered. And if said shampoo cost R250 then so be it. I know I have blogged and tweeted a bit about how I have struggled with the move from 1 to 2 kids but one aspect has been so simple and blissful: I now know that there is no right way, there is only your way and your way is the best way.


Wednesday, February 01, 2017

I’ve been on this quest to lead a more mindful, minimal life. It’s a massive challenge because we are all so naturally geared toward excess. Having less feels like an effort. Not only that, it feels like, well, less… Does that make sense? It’s like everyone around has so much – and I mean so much of everything really – that choosing to have less almost feels like a weird sort of failure? It’s not though. And I am really starting to fully grasp how all of the excess I have allowed into my life has affected me.


Tuesday, January 31, 2017

As cheesy as it sounds, adopting an attitude of gratitude has really helped me lead a more mindful, intentional life this month. Just stopping to smell the roses and taking pleasure in every moment, however big or small has left me feeling truly appreciative of the life I have. We exist in such a comparative society, sharing so much of ourselves online, its so easy to fall into the “she has a better life than me” trap.


Wednesday, January 18, 2017

I always type the title of my blog posts last. Mostly because I never really know where my mind will carry me. At first I titled this post “What it means to raise a girl in South Africa”. Then I changed it to “How to raise a feminist”. Then I changed it once again to “Raise your daughter to feel empowered”. Basically, I know what I want to say; I just don’t know how to say it well. So stay with me here.


Thursday, January 05, 2017

Let me paint the scene:

The toddler is mid-way through an epic, toe-curling tantrum.
Said tantrum has woken the baby.
I’m in tears, covered in sweat (hello summer) and smelling like a mixture of garbage and the Dove I liberally sprayed all over my body to cover the garbage smell.
Regan is at work.
My mom/backup life support is busy.
There is no one around.
Oh I forgot to mention… I need to wee.

Sounds pretty familiar right? I know that I am not the only mom that often feels like she is drowning (literally DROWNING) under the weight of parenting and household responsibilities. We try to do everything… raise well adjusted kids, be amazing wives, cook healthy meals, manage our household, rock the pants off our careers and when we struggle, we shut up about it.

Why does “I need help” feel like the hardest sentence for any mom to say? Why does taking time out for ourselves leave us riddled with guilt? The other day I was in the shower and Gracie was crying, Regan was with her but I felt so flippen guilty that I rushed through the process, didn’t wash my hair and ended up putting on my pj’s before I even allowed myself the luxury of drying off my body properly.

It’s pure insanity.

In my heart I know that I cannot be all the things I strive to be (mom, wife, homemaker, career boss, nice person) without taking enough time for myself. It’s the one thing I find so incredibly difficult to come to terms with. And I know I am not alone.

After watching the movie, Bad Moms, I realised that I need to get better at this. My kids will not suffer if I am not around 24/7. They won’t turn into criminal drug abusers if I take a 2 hour bath occasionally. They won’t suffer a developmental crisis if I don’t read to them every single night.

It’s totally fine to love myself as much as I love my kids and my partner. Say it with me now: IT’S OK TO LOVE MYSELF AS MUCH AS I LOVE MY KIDS AND MY PARTNER.

Let's start making our happiness a priority, because frankly, if we're not ok, no one is. Ok, I'm off to soak in the tub. By myself. Without an audience. 
Peace out Queens!

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