Wednesday, March 12, 2014

There’s a beautiful chill in the morning air, I think its called Autumn. Sophie has started wearing warmer pajama’s at night, she’s morphed into a fluffy snuggly little cherub. Most nights Regan and I argue over who’s turn it is to spoon her. I usually win because his arms are heavier than mine. 

The best thing about Sophie sleeping in our bed is this cuddle time while she’s asleep. I get to hold her and nuzzle her neck without annoying her or having her dart off to some sparkly thing that’s caught her eye like she does when she’s awake. Every night before I fall asleep I lay my head so close to hers and just breathe her in. I feel like my heart expands with each breath and more and more love just pours in.

The older Sophie gets, the more I get told that I am spoiling her. I remember when my gran came over after Sophie was born, she said “Don’t hold her too much, you’ll spoil her”. I remember at that moment coming to terms with the fact that I would be ok with having a spoiled child. Now I still hear a lot about it, spoiling.

What a horrible word to associate with a child, I mean, you might as well use decaying, rotting, putrefying or ruining…. Because that is what you are implying. When ever I spend a little time indulging Sophie’s daily whims a little voice (that sounds a lot like my gran) whispers somewhere far off in my mind, “don’t spoil her”. I use Sophie’s gurgling laugh to drown out that whisper.

Very honestly, if every fuss I make, ouchie I kiss or cuddle I give leads to a child that is emotionally reliant on her parents then so be it, because aren’t children supposed to rely on their parents emotionally? I’m not delusional; I know that one day Sophie will want nothing to do with Regan and I. She will outgrow her bed time stories, she will move beyond her need to cuddle her mama, she will run off and be her own person. When that day arrives I don’t want to wish I had held her more, because I can do that now.

No adult looks back on their childhood and says, “actually I think my parents loved me a bit too much” do they? 

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